Momma collected beautiful little sculptures that she called "Seraphim Classic Angels." The head of our bed was really big and had a lot of shelves and that's where she displayed them. She would laugh and say that she could never do anything bad in her bedroom while her Angels were watching her. One was a sculpture of a ballerina with wings. It was perfect in every detail down to each tiny finger and fingernail on the graceful hand poised over her head. The ballerina was very special to momma, she said a group of friends had given it to her for her fortieth birthday.

My mouth started to hurt and my ears itched just a week or two after my backside surgery. So momma took me back to the vet place. Len petted me then stuck something down my ears. That was horrible! I didn't enjoy having my ears touched that way. I struggled to get away from him and climbed onto momma as soon as he let go. But momma put me down and held me herself while Len yanked open my mouth and stuck something in my bum and did lots of nasty things. I thought that if I purred and rubbed myself against Len that he'd stop and be nice to me like momma always was but that didn't work. Maybe if I got closer to him...

I climbed onto Len's chest as soon as the prodding was finished. He seemed to like me there except he did squirm when I started licking his face. He kept saying that he'd never had a cat be that affectionate in his office. He cuddled me as he told momma that my mouth was fine except that I was teething and that I had a yeast infection in my ears. He gave momma special water to squirt into my ears and taught her how to clean them out with soft little sticks and showed her how to shove the sticks way down in without hurting me. I did *not* like this being done and I wiggled and furiously shook my head every time they touched my ears. He demonstrated how to wrap me up tight in a towel so I couldn't move but I showed him. I was smarter and stronger than he thought and I wasn't going to submit to the indignity of being wrapped up like that no matter how much momma wanted it! Len ended up giving momma something called a "Cat Sack" to hold me still. And he said she had to do that cleaning every day until I got better, then she would have to get a different kind of water and do it twice a week, forever. Momma had cleaned my ears before but it was nothing like this. I always hated that sack and hated having my ears cleaned even though momma was gentle and was extra nice to me when it was done. And though I made it difficult for her, momma cleaned them every few days right up until the time I got really sick, years later.

But my mouth still ached and there wasn't anything they could do about that, though Len had said I'd feel much better in a few weeks when my adult teeth all came in. But one morning my mouth hurt really bad. And there was that beautiful ballerina statue with its hand held up in the air. That hand beckoned me; it looked so hard and cool that I just knew it would make my gums feel better. I gingerly reached out and nibbled its thumb. It felt so good in my mouth! So I slowly gnawed and chewed.

When momma came home from work and was walking to the bathroom like she always did, she looked inside the bedroom to make sure I was under the covers. But this morning she caught me standing at the head of the bed with the ballerina's hand in my mouth. She cried out "Little Ren, WHAT are you doing?!" I turned my head and looked at her and knew that momma wasn't happy for some reason. She walked over and picked up the little ballerina then suddenly started laughing. She hooted and laughed until she cried. On the upraised hand I had chewed off the thumb and three of the fingers. Momma thought it was hysterically funny when she saw the one significant finger that I'd left untouched, thrust up into the air. Afterwards she always called that statue "The Ballerina Giving Me the Bird."



The months passed swiftly. I grew big and strong. One day momma and Darlene took us to an amazing place called a pet store. It had so many kitty toys and beds that my head swam; I nuzzled and sniffed and played and had a wonderful time, and if Pedda or I seemed to really like something then momma or Darlene would put it into our big basket.

We drew a lot of attention. It seemed everyone there had heard of us and wanted to touch us! I didn't mind being petted by strangers but I made sure that some part of me was always touching momma because I knew she'd protect me. Then momma put me in the lap of a man who was wearing a fuzzy red and white suit. And a bright light flashed in my face! But I wasn't frightened and happily purred as he held me. And when the man was done petting me - he said he never wanted to let me go - momma plucked me away from him and sat me back in our big basket. Then Pedda got put on his lap and she got to see the bright light too. And I could tell from the look on her face that she wasn't happy about it.

Little Ren


Pedda


When we got home momma took all our wonderful new toys and beds and locked them up. She said she was saving them for "Christmas." And later that day she and Darlene were looking at pieces of paper and Darlene was grumbling about pictures that could have been better, but momma said it was for charity so it didn't matter and besides, now she had a picture of us so she was happy. She said that she needed to get a camera, whatever that was. I don't know if she ever got one or not.

We were all very happy, though a few days later sadness struck. One afternoon momma was playing with us with a teaser toy. Even crotchety old Weanus would normally join in the fun and pounce at it. But not today. He just laid on his perch and watched. Momma gave him one of his special treats but all he did was sniff at it. Momma sighed and slowly stroked his head and asked him if it was time. She watched him for a minute, saying nothing, then she locked up the toy and sat by Weanus, just crying and petting him as she talked. She told him how beautiful he was and how much she'd always loved him from the moment she first saw him when he was born, and how happy she was that she'd been able to raise him without his mommy kitty from when he was two days old, and that she was so grateful that they'd shared almost twenty years of love together. Her quiet voice reminded him of so many memories long past, of when he was a young cat, and how he would proudly pose with his magnificent tail held high when he was known as a Grand Premier, and of how soft his face was when he would stand in front of her and stretch up, putting his paws on her shoulders and then rubbing his cheek against hers, back in the years when he could still do that. And when she was finally done speaking she put Weanus in his own bigger little cage and took him on a trip.

When momma got home she was crying again. She hugged me and I rubbed my soft white nuzzle against her, doing my best to comfort her. She told me that she'd had to help Weanus go to the Rainbow Bridge, that going was a blessing for him and that he would wait for us there. I didn't know where that "Rainbow Bridge" was. All I know is that I never saw Weanus again.

I loved going to visit Darlene. Pedda and I raced up and down a big stairway, and we ran across a cold hard floor, then stopped on a rug so it would go sliding with us on it. It was such fun!

Darlene had a back yard that had a tall wooden fence all around it. Momma and Darlene would let us go outside to play in the grass while they sat in chairs watching us and sipping drinks that tasted nasty. They laughed as they watched us, though one time they started screaming because we caught a furry critter with long ears. They came running and made us let go of it, then carried us into the house and closed the big glass door so we couldn't get outside. I think they were afraid that long-earred beast would hurt us.

We visited Darlene mostly every other weekend when momma didn't have to go to the place that made her all smelly, she called it "work."

I didn't like momma going to work. She would leave us in late afternoon and didn't get home until the next morning. When she got home she smelled funny. And she would never cuddle us as soon as she got home, she always chased us away cause she said she'd been around sick people and didn't want to give us "germs." Then she'd run to the bathroom and take off all her clothes, and put them in the big machine that made a lot of noise and vibrated, then she would get into the big box that made water splash down on her. It was only after she had done this strange ritual that she would call for us and pick us up and kiss us. It didn't take me long to figure this out, so pretty soon I stopped leaving our nice warm bed when she got home. If I got up she'd just say "Not now Ren-buttski, I have to get my shower first", so why bother? But Pedda was dumb, Pedda would jump up and go racing to the door the moment she thought momma would be walking in. Silly Pedda. Momma never petted her then either.

I fell more in love with momma every day. She talked to us like we were people. She told us everything that was good, and bad, and many things that didn't matter at all. But I loved hearing her voice and I understood the feelings behind her words even if sometimes I didn't understand exactly what she said. My old momma, the one I had when I was a baby, used to talk at me - but she never talked *to* me. Though I could only meow, I knew the difference, and it made my momma more precious to me.

Momma had a tiny box that she always kept with her. It would start making noise and she'd pick it up and hold it to her ear and start talking into it. Sometimes she'd go crazy and pick it up and just start talking into it for no reason at all that I could see! I was jealous of that little box. If I was snuggled up against her head she'd make me move so she could talk into it. And I would start meowing and rubbing against her hand that held the little box, my way of telling momma that I was still here and please don't forget about me, please talk to me and tell me you still love me. And as soon as momma laid down the little box she would scoop me up and hold me close, nuzzling her nose against me and murmuring nonsensical noises. But maybe they weren't nonsensical after all, because I always knew what they meant.

When momma didn't go to the work place and when we weren't at Darlene's, momma used to spend all evening sitting in front of a thing she called a "computer." I rather liked the computer, it was warm and was a nice spot to sit if Pedda had dibs on momma's lap. Often I would creep onto momma's chest, resting my back paws on top of Pedda-in-the-lap and my top paws on momma's shoulder. And momma would rub her cheek against my face and I'd rub my cheek and nose against her neck, and her hands would cradle me ever so gently. Then Pedda would get pissy and make me move so I'd go back to the top of the computer. Pedda couldn't stand seeing me in a nice warm spot. So she'd jump on top of the computer; which left momma free for me to lay on! And after a while Pedda would climb on top of me while I was clinging to momma and chase me away. So I'd go back on top of the computer. This would continue all evening and eventually momma would grow tired of it and start complaining that she wasn't a freeway and we needed to find a spot and settle down. Pedda would stalk off in a huff and go crawl under the bed blankets. And then momma would be all mine!

One evening momma gave me a bath. And when it came time for us to have our can of dinner, momma forgot to give it to us. And I don't know what she was thinking, but she locked up our dry food so we didn't have anything to eat! Pedda and I vociferously complained but it didn't do any good. I don't know what was wrong with momma but she sure wasn't listening to us. Finally we went to bed, still hungry. Pedda was upset and kept waking momma up. Momma wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close and said that if Little Ren had to go hungry then we all had to go hungry. I didn't know what she meant by that but I didn't like it.

The next morning momma put me in the little box and took me on a trip. And when she carried it into a room I knew that smell. It was the vet place!

"I'm sure he'll do fine" I heard Len say. "After what you said the other day, I did some looking and couldn't find much. But what I did find was that everyone agrees that ketamine shouldn't be used on sphynx cats. I'll use a gas called isoflurane instead. I'll give you a call as soon as the surgery is finished." Momma put her face against my little cage and told me she loved me and she'd be back for me, then I was whisked off and put on a cold steel table and a cone was put over my face and everything went black.

When I woke up my nether bits were sore and I had two cuts down there. I kept licking them. Then the little girl named Pam got out of a big yellow moving machine and she played with me until momma came, and I soon forgot about the stinging feeling below my butt. Len was laughing as Pam carried me out to give me back to momma. "That's the first cat I've ever neutered that I didn't have to shave first!"

I was starving when momma got me home! Pedda hissed at me but I ignored her and ran right for the foodbowl and started gobbling it down. Then I crawled on momma's shoulder and took a nap, and I think momma chased Pedda away every time she came to pester me. Then we all went to bed. And when I woke up the next day snuggled against momma's face I felt good as new.

I settled into my new home very quickly. Momma had a big carpeted thing sitting right in front of a living room window. She called it a "kitty condo." I loved to scamper up and down it, though old Weanus would sometimes smack at me from his platform. If I yipped and ran away momma always picked me up and cuddled me and kissed my fears away.

I loved my new momma. I liked to rest my paws on her right shoulder and she would support my back legs with her arm, or I'd put them on top of her booby if her arms were busy doing something. I let myself go completely limp, letting every bit of me touch her. I couldn't get close enough to her. And she would slowly stroke me, from the top of my head moving down to my tail, over and over.

And momma taught me things too. She taught me that I must always, ALWAYS go to her when she let out a particular whistle. She said I had to learn that whistle and that I must never ignore it, because if the house ever caught on fire or something bad happened I needed a signal that I was to come to her no matter what. I thought that was silly but momma wanted it; and she always gave me a nice treat so it wasn't hard to do!

After a few days she put me back in the little box and told me that I was going to meet my vet. She bundled me out to the car and the trip didn't take long at all.

Soon I was put on a cold stainless steel table in a tiny room, then a kindly looking man walked in. Momma smiled and called him "Len." Len took one look at me and started laughing. "Oh my, Marlene, you've gotten another Sphynx! Let me call Jane and the kids over, they're going to love this!"

Soon the vet's wife and two children came into the room. How great was this - more attention for me! I went back and forth from human to human, crawling up into their arms and sniffing and licking as they petted me. The little girl was named "Pam" and she was my favorite. She had long hair and she giggled as I played with it. In the years to come, every time I went to the vet he would call Pam and she'd come play with me.

The visit went well and I tolerated the cold steel being held against my chest and tummy, and I didn't even try to get away when they put a rubber band around my leg and poked something into my leg and stole my blood, though it did hurt a bit. And it hurt when he did something he called "giving me a shot." But I didn't mind too much and didn't even squirm, because my momma was holding me. I just pushed my nose against her chest until it was done. I knew momma would never let anything hurt me.

I didn't feel very good that night and even threw up once. She said it was the shot that upset my tummy. And she held me all night long and by the next day I felt much better.

And then came the time when momma looked at me and told me I was dirty. I rubbed my soft white nose against her and tried to tell her it wasn't my fault. She informed me it was time for us to get a bath. And little did I know, that when she said "us" she really meant "us!"

Momma put nice warm water in the bathtub. Then she took off her clothes, and she took off mine and Pedda's clothes too! Then she took Pedda and me into the bathroom and closed the door.

She gave Pedda her bath first. Momma's idea of a bath was crazy! She held Pedda then both of them sat down in the bathtub. She put Pedda down in the water between her legs. Pedda started howling. She got Pedda all wet, then pulled Pedda out of the water and sat her on top of her legs, against her belly, then scrubbed her all over with little cloths, even her face and butt! Pedda yowled like she was being killed. I stood up on the edge of the tub and watched everything. That Pedda was being shown who was boss and she was majorly pissed about it! If I was a human and could laugh I would have. But I couldn't, so I just meow'd back at her.

Soon Pedda was rinsed and clean and wrapped in a fat fluffy towel. Then it was my turn.

"Come here Ren-butt." Soon momma had scooped me up and I was in the bathtub with her, just like Pedda had been!

I was a good boy though. I didn't yip or yowl, but I did squirm some when momma washed my dangling bits. She was talking to me and I heard her say something about having to have that taken care of soon.

This bath was much better than how my old momma did it. I got to sit on momma's lap and she held me close through the whole thing. And when it was done and I was wrapped in my towel momma let all the water out of the tub, then stood up and turned on water so it splashed all over and she washed herself too! So all three of us were clean.

The next day momma said we were going to meet her best human friend in the world, a woman named Darlene. Pedda and I got put into the same carrier and we rode for over an hour. It was the longest trip I'd ever taken. Pedda threw up on me. It was nasty! Then my bowels got all in an uproar so for revenge I pooped on her head. That's what she got for jamming it underneath me!

Pedda and me both got a new bath when we got to Darlene's house but it was just a quick normal bath in a kitchen sink. The strange lady, who was fat like momma, picked me up and cuddled me.

"So you're Little Ren" she said. "I'm Darlene, I'm your Second Momma. You're going to spend a lot of time here with me." Then Darlene started laughing. "Marlene, this poor kitty. Look at him. He has just one teeny weeny whisker and it's curled up. Like a wart or something. It looks weird, you should cut it off!" Momma was laughing too. "That poor boy has only one whisker - and you want to deprive him of it!"

Luckily I never lost my whisker.

I had the idea of writing a series of articles as a tribute to my beloved Little Ren. And though it will ultimately end in sadness, as all tales of living creatures must, it isn't meant to be a sad story; it's a celebration of life and love and happiness.

And so I present to you Part I of the Memoirs of Little Ren; the story of a Sphynx from his point of view.

********************

I don't remember much about the early days. I remember warmth, and darkness, and softness as I kneaded my dam's breast, and the comfort of hot sweet milk squirting into my mouth after I had been victorious at winning a nipple from one of my littermates. But there was fear too. When my dam left the nest I always cried, afraid that she wasn't coming back. I think I feared being alone more than anything, back then. And come to think of it, I don't think that deep seated fear ever did really leave, even years later. I would always wrap my paw's around my Momma's neck and press my body as close to her as I could get, wanting every bit of me to touch her. But that was later.

One day my eyes opened and I saw light! And as I grew I learned that light was good, for if I went into the light that came from outside it would warm me. Not like the warmth from my momma or littermates, but it was a nice toasty feeling and I was quite fond of it.

We grew bigger and each day was exciting! We romped and played until we were exhausted, then collapsed in heaps wherever we happened to be. And our dam always came back and we would try to sneak milk from her, though she soon grew tired of these antics and started batting us away.

More days passed, many more days. And then came times when strange humans arrived. They looked at us and played with us, and one by one my littermates were put into tiny cages and carried out the door. They were going with their new families. But not me. They never picked me.

"Too skinny" some said. "It looks sick" others stated. Each time someone came I tried harder and harder to make friends with them. "Pick me!" I meow'ed at them. "Pick ME!" But they always left me behind.

Then very early one morning, while it was still dark out, a fat lady came. My human momma that I had to share with all the other kitties spoke very quietly, for the rest of the house was asleep. "This is the little boy I was telling you about. He's four and a half months old. He's left over from my last litter. No one wanted him. Everyone said he was too skinny and looked sickly." She stretched me out so the fat lady could see just how long and lean I was.

The fat lady reached out and took me. She gently cradled me and I curled against her chest, purring softly as I hopefully looked up into her eyes. Would she be the one? Was she going to be my momma from now on?

I felt a soft rumble come from her as she chuckled. It reminded me of my kitty momma's purr and reassured me. "He's not sick. He just has an oriental type body. But he'll still have to stay in isolation for a while. I'll keep him in my bedroom." My human momma smiled. "Oh, if you let him sleep with you he'll love you forever." Years later Momma said she always remembered that sentence: If you let him sleep with you he'll love you forever. She said it was because I did.

The fat lady looked down into my eyes again. "He wasn't chosen because he was meant for me, you know. God has a way of doing these things." Some pieces of paper changed hands and soon I found myself bundled into one of the small cages and carried out the door just like my brothers and sisters. I was going to my new home!

The fat lady put my little cage on the seat beside her then strapped it in so it couldn't move. And soon I felt almost queasy, as if the world was somehow moving beneath me! But the lady talked to me the whole time and I soon forgot about the funny moving feeling.

She said many things. She told me that she was my momma now and that I shouldn't be afraid, because she loved me. She said that I was going to have a new brother named Tigger, who was a big hairy cat. I squinted my eyes and tried to imagine what this Tigger looked like. Imagine, a cat with hair! I wondered if it was sick or something. And she told me that I would also live with my half-sister, Pedda, and that Pedda and I had the same sire, whatever a sire was. And she said there was another very old hairy cat there too, named Weanus, but that I mustn't pay much attention to him and should just leave him alone because he was old and crotchety. She kept talking and I answered back whenever I could get a meow in edgewise. And in the middle of this rambling she told me my name was "Ren."

The miles slipped away and soon my carrier was unfastened and I was taken into my new house! Oh, how wonderful this experience was! My eyes were huge as I looked around. I wanted to meet my new kitty family!

But my momma had other ideas. "I know you look healthy and the other kitties looked good too, but you're staying in isolation for two weeks, just to be sure." She took me into her bedroom and closed the door, then let me out of the carrier. I started running around the room, my nose twitching at all the new wonderful scents. I ran and jumped on the bed and it moved underneath me! What fun! I spent a minute just jumping up and down on it to make it wiggle. But soon I was off exploring.

My momma just sat on the bed talking quietly to me and petting me whenever I came within reach. She had a nice litterbox there which I used, and I sniffed at the food and water. Then the howling started.

It came from the other side of the door. There were kitties out there!

I ran to the door, desperate to get out and join them. But the door was solid and wouldn't move. But wait - the door didn't quite reach all the way down to the floor. And soon I saw a hairless paw sneak under it, clawing at the carpet as it tried to reach me! "Who is there? Get out of here you stranger, you don't belong here. And let me in, what do you mean locking me out of my own bedroom!" Those meows belonged to another Sphynx and she didn't sound happy. It was followed by some very soft, almost bird-like chirps from another feline. "Why are you locked in there? Who are you? Come out and play with us!" And soon a paw - a great, hairy paw - was also clawing under the door at me.

"Come on little Ren, let's go to bed. I'm tired, I worked all last night." My new momma climbed into bed and invitingly held the covers open for me. I so wanted to go to her but these other kitties - I just couldn't stay away from the door. Momma yawned and did her best to try to get to sleep.

After two hours Momma gave up the fight. Tigger was still chirping and that Pedda - who sounded like a really nasty girl - was still hissing, spitting, snarling, and howling at the top of her lungs. You'd think she would have gotten tired of it by now but no, if anything she was even louder than when I'd arrived. "I can't take this anymore" Momma said. "Ok, I guess you're big enough to take care of yourself." She wearily climbed from the bed and threw open the door.

The other normal cat, Pedda, threw herself at me. THWAP THWAP she smacked me with her paws though I hadn't done anything. "I'm the boss here and don't you forget it." That duty done, she ignored me and jumped on the bed then lay across Momma's neck.

Tigger sniffed me, then started curling himself around me, weaving a pattern as if he was rubbing against legs. "You can sleep with me, when Pedda isn't with me." Then he showed me the rest of the house while Pedda kept her position of superiority on Momma's neck.

Momma seemed very happy when she woke up. Tigger was laying across her feet and Pedda had retreated beneath the covers to sleep behind her knees. As for me, I was left with the prime spot, right against Momma's face. I felt her lips curve into a smile as she kissed me and whispered "Little Ren, you're really Home now." Life was going to be grand!